I NEED A WATERPROOF BAG!

I NEED A WATERPROOF BAG. YES TOTALLY 100% WATERPROOF.

I am so fed up with having to dry my books and worksheets everytime I come home after a walk in the rain with my umbrella. Everything's wet and crumpled and untidy. I sooooo hate it. And the rain in the west is unique, the raindrops are slanted. So you will get wet somehow, someway. I don't mind getting wet but not my books and worksheets! Grrr. In fact all the contents in my bag are wet except for those in the biggest compartment. That's the only waterproof component of my bag.

It pains me to see my notebooks and worksheets wet. Especially the contents in my Community Service Club file. It irritates me too, seeing everything so untidy. Oh well. I shouldn't grumble actually. I should be glad and thankful to be alive and kicking at home now for I have looked out for cars before crossing the pedestrian crossing while walking home. Two vehicles just zoomed past me despite seeing me at the side of the road, waiting for them to stop and cross =.- Luckily I looked out for cars. My horoscope is so true. It told me to be aware of road safety this year. Yes I am being very careful ^^

Had china studies test today. Floppish. I was so worried and told myself to pay attention during lessons next time. Waha. The past few days were torturous. I actually had to discipline myself and stop watching 花样少年少女 on Channel U. I have more important schoolwork to deal with. So I shall try to catch one or two episodes on youtube tonight, if possible. My literature journal is enough to eat up all my free time lah, and it's due next friday. Mdm Nora seemed determined not to grant us any extra time allowance this time. Aw.

Did analysis of romantic poems for today's literature lesson. I'm loving it ;)

I shall go do some constructive stuff now. Bye.

A Miracle happened

Miracles do come true when you are in desperate need of them. One just did, right before my eyes. A couple of hours ago, my internet was having the same problem it had before it was sent for servicing... and then now it's ok... after I have gone to all the troubles to download Internet Explorer 7.0 from my brother's desktop and about to ask him to send me through msn so that I can re-install. Yeah I feel so freaking pissed at first. But still I am so extremely glad that this darling laptop is fine. Yeah super thankful for this miracle... thank you thank you.

I better go start on my homework. I found out that those which have to be handed in tomorrow are mostly undone. Brilliant! I was still happily watching 花样少年少女 on Channel U just now. Currently addicted to the drama series liao. If I have the time I would have watched on youtube. boohoo.

Gonna run. bye!

Quote of the Day

I just realised that I cannot multi-task well online... I was trying to juggle doing research for my GP essay and China Studies Essay separately. But I failed. Yeah it's that hard. Go try. It's late and I really should go to bed. Back to school tmr (: But lotsa incomplete homework :(

Alright here's a quote for the day:

Guard well your spare moments. They are like uncut diamonds. Discard them and their value will never be known. Improve them and they will become the brightest gems in a useful life. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Cheers, Happy Chinese New Year~!

<<会有天使替我爱你>>

终于读完<<会有天使替我爱你>>, 虽然是个快乐的结局但读的过程中感触真的很多. 很多时候鼻子都会酸了一下, 有一种想哭的冲动, 眼泪差一点就掉了下来, 却被吞了回去. 我为小米和曜那艰难的爱情感到悲伤, 为小米的固执感到无奈, 为曜的专一和执着感到佩服, 也当然为他们最后在一起感到开心... 但这份爱情来得真不容易, 小米的泪水足以形成一个河流, 曜的心也不知痛了几次.

作者的后记更是让我想了很多, 我领悟生命是多么的脆弱. 我们永远预料不到下一刻会发生什么事或是谁将离开我们, 特别是那些我们爱的人.

凡人啊, 常常生在福中不知福, 只有在失去幸福时才后悔. 幸福不一定是永恒的, 它可以是很短暂的, 只有真心去珍惜此刻所拥有的幸福, 才是真正掌握了幸福.

我常常觉得幸福很渺茫, 不知是在天涯还是海角, 却不曾在我的身边. 我错了. 幸福一直都在我的身边, 只是我察觉不到, 没有去珍惜, 一心只想追求我认为是幸福的幸福. 还好我醒悟了, 从此开始珍惜我所拥有的一切.

一些我觉得很感人/有意义的对白:

后记: "如果看这本书让你有点伤感, 那就快快珍惜你身边那些爱你的人们. 和喜欢的人在一起, 可以对他任性撒娇, 可以对他发脾气, 但是, 你要知道你是幸福的, 要珍惜这种幸福."

曜: "如果... ..."
"忘记一切, 但是你仍然在我身边的地方. 如果必定要你离开才能忘记一切, 那么... ..."
"... ... 那么, 我情愿就让一切保持原状."

曜: "我生病了, 我没有发现, 而你却发现了, 然后你非常非常担心, 这样才会觉得幸福啊."

优: "从很小的时候, 我就希望自己是一个天使, 有一双翅膀可以飞翔, 纯白无暇, 完美得没有缺点, 并且能够给所有我爱的人们带来最多的幸福."

小米: "天使们都是一国的, 它们一定生活得很幸福, 因为它身边都是善良的天使. 天使只会遇到天使, 即使最初是恶魔也会被它变成天使. 虽然我们看不到它们, 但天使们能够看到我们, 天使都是希望它守护的人幸福的, 所以只要我们幸福, 天使也会很幸福."

曜: "你走吧... ..." "你走吧," "我不要你在身边了, 你走吧... ..."
小米: "我走了, 你会死吗?"
曜: "我喜欢你."
小米: "因为喜欢我, 所以你不会死. 是吗?"
曜: "... ... 是."
小米: "好, 那我会等你."
曜: "等多久?"
小米: "只要你不死, 我就一直等下去."
曜: "... ... 如果, 我死了呢?"
小米: "那我就不等了. 我会忘记你, 无论在天国还是地狱, 我会彻彻底底地忘记你, 一点关于你的记忆也不会有."
曜: "... ... 为什么?"
小米: "因为我会恨你."

即使你已经不爱我了
即使你已经忘记我了
即使我已经从这个世界消失
我依然会爱着你
我会去找一个天使
让它替我爱你

好书! (:

Late for Kbox Outing

Oh no I am gonna be late for (j)AYYES Kbox outing. To think I was telling Yun Yin not to be late yesterday Anyway, I am going to be late for a valid reason. Need to go back to school to collect my scholarship application forms from the office, endorsed by Mr Sng. Then I have to specially deliver it to the organization, since the closing date for submission is tomorrow. They won't be able to receive it in time if I mail it today =.-

I guess I will be joining the girls a bit later, otherwise I have to trouble my parents to deliver it to the organization for me :S

I read <<会有天使替我爱你>> this morning while having breakfast (I am talented at multitasking ;) And I read till this heart-wrenching part where the male protagonist found out the real reason why the girl started to get close to him... It's actually quite a dumb reason lah which totally don't make sense but I decided to let the romantic side of me take over while reading and so aw I have the urge to cry but I didn't. I am getting better at controlling my tears and emotions (:

Alright I shall go read my Literature notes then go down to school at 12 plus. Otherwise I will clash into their lunch time. Hmm or maybe if I am lucky enough, I get to hitch a free ride from my dad ^^

Not-good Day

Some statistics from yesterday, I received 25 postcards and 3 letters in all, together with all the gifts. And among these gifts, there are actually 6 pairs of earrings! And I received like 3 pairs of earrings during our JAYYES christmas gathering last year. Earrings should be banned as a gift to me from now onwards. Nah just kidding but I definitely get to save alot on earrings nowadays (:

Top three not-good events of today:

1. I scared myself upon looking into the mirror in the morning, for I saw a panda staring back at me. That's the 'reward' for sleeping at 1am the past two days.

2. My handphone battery was low the moment I switched it on. I must have forgotten to switch it off last night lah, I was so tired that I couldn't care more. I just pressed the 'off' button then went to sleep. Apparently I didn't press the button properly.

3. The two periods of China Studies were lonely. Yi Ling and Yi Xian have switched from CSC to CLL, that means I have no one to tease during CSC from now on. How sad lah. But amazingly, I began to pay more attention to what WLS said during the lessons, for I have to face the cruel reality of not having anyone to rely on from now onwards. There's a high possibility of Jue Hui making the same choice as YL and YX. Aw. I don't intend to switch subjects... so I have to start working hard for CSC now.

The six days of CNY holidays are so packed with homework. I am quite worried that I may not be able to complete them on time, thanks to my procrastinator nature. Shall not be a worrier yet. I will try to plan and manage my time well but that goal seems bleak and most probably requires a miracle to achieve it.

Anyway Community Service Club will be setting up a blog real soon. Yeah hope that it will make things more convenient for all core/non-core members as well as ad-hoc participants. We should also have an email address for our club. I shall look into that.

Watched 花样少年少女 just now. And Tank's 专属天使 kept playing in the background. One of my favourite songs, introduced by Wen Jian. The song is pretty much linked to the romance novel which I am indulging in now... Yuhan lent it to me and I started reading it in December 2006 and have not finished it yet. There are like two people in the queue to borrow the book already.

From Tank's 专属天使:

我不会怪你对我的伪装
天使在人间是该藏好翅膀

And this extract from <<会有天使替我爱你>>:

满天霞光中, 她的身影忽然恍若透明, 透明得仿佛身后有一双天使的翅膀.

Yeah how touching and thought-provoking these two extracts are.

So...

Look at the people around you... They might just be angels sent to watch over you! (:

Valentine's Day

Now is officially one day after Valentine's Day. I didn't manage to carry out what I intended to do for Valentine's Day but at least I had my sistas with me. Yeah I am so touched that they waited in school for me to fill in the scholarship application form. Thanks so much! (:

Received lotsa gifts and gave away lots too... Felt so loved lah. Thank you everyone (:

Yeah yesterday had been a wonderful day and tomorrow will be an even better day.

Cheers!

Tri-Touch Bodynits Scholarship

I have so many things to do that I don't know where to start from. I spent the past one hour thinking and considering if I should apply for the Tri-Touch Bodynits Scholarship. I am on the verge of filling in the form. What I am worried about is of course the bond term as well as my capability to cope with the service learning project I have to initiate if I am awarded the scholarship and my studies. Just the thought of having to take A'levels about 17 months from now freaks me out. But well on the other hand, this is my last year to apply and I am afraid that I will regret if I don't do so. Yes yes I know. Follow my heart. So I suppose I will give it a try (:

The tour at Singapore Discovery Centre this afternoon was really eye-opening. The talk by the fire-fighters made me look up to them, despite having to listen with a growling stomach. The bus tour around the military area was extremely fruitful too. I had popcorn for lunch and I only managed to eat like 1/2 a pack. Too sweet for my liking lah.

There's a Chem Quiz tomorrow and my revision has not started. I need to do as much maths and chem tutorial questions as I can. Start on my Literature essay and yeah get my beauty sleep.

Oh yes I really have to go on a diet now. How sad! Especially since CNY is approaching real soon. Have to control my intake of CNY goodies and fork out an hour or two to exercise. I aim to lose 1kg by March.

Friday's off for us Dunmanians, thanks to the excellent O'level results obtained by the students. Yay. How fun. Anyone heading back to GMPS? ;)

Alright homework time...

Random

Came online again to look for some background information of the Palace Museum in Beijing. I have to complete an essay on how the Starbucks in Palace Museum poses a threat to the China culture. And about Starbucks, aww. I have yet to use the vouchers and I think I am going to use it to treat myself on Valentine's Day. Anyway Valentine's Day this year is not going to be lonely. Cos I am going to spend it with the real 'me' (: Maybe go catch 'Happy Birthday' then spend the rest of the day at Starbucks enjoying some iced coffee and reading my romance novel <<会有天使替我爱你>>.

So... that's my plan for 14 Feb but unforeseen circumstances might crop up. I shall not be too excited.

It's currently 10.50pm and I aimed to finish my CSC essay by 12am then sleep, waking up at 4am to work on my geometric progresson tutorial questions which I most probably will not know how to tackle. The first three warm-up questions are already considered unsolvable for me. Uh oh.

And with me to fight the 'CSC Battle' till 12am are 4 pieces of Halls honeylemon candy, 3/4 bottle of Vitamin C drink (Since I caught the flu bug just now) and yes my optimism and excitement of finishing my essay and heading to bed for my beauty sleep.

Alright 10.55pm, better log off. Time is precious. Each second matters!

给你一副翅膀, 让你飞向天堂
给你一个天使, 让人生充满希望

(I am so helplessly obsessed with 天使 these days, 都是那些爱情小说害的=p)

Caught the flu bug

I am feeling terribly sick now. My flu is making me feel very giddy. I must have sneezed like at least 50 times and used up at least half box of tissue papers today. Thanks to the dust in my room. I actually spent half of today tidying my room, it was such a messy sight that I couldnt stand it and now I have fallen sick without completing my CSC essay yet. How dead is that. My room is definitely a lot neater now and my nose ALOT redder. All the rubbing and sneezing made me look like a red-nosed reindeer. Brilliant.

I have a whole 11 hours to get well so that I can go to school tomorrow and not spread the germs to the people around me. Wishing myself a speedy recovery!

Love is in the air!

Chatting with Eileen online has always been a good experience. She likes to give me nicknames like 'Chairprincess', 'Baby Bel' etc which I never hesitate to put as my msn nick. Creativity (:

And now she calls me an abbreviation freak! Cos I invented terms like jj. Cannot tell you what issit. Belongs to Jayyes ;)

I am currently in love with love quotes by Shakespeare. whom I can declare as my idol since I am a Literature student. And I found the quote that Miss Tan introduced to us during GP lesson. Find it in Act 1 Scene 5 of Twelfth Night. Shakespeare is jus so talented!

Received my O'levels HCL results today. I am contented with my A2. But the atmosphere wasn't very lively. I think I babbled a lot of wrong things, with the intention of cheering people up, but kinda backfired. I am sorry, girls. I really should have knew better to keep quiet at the right time.

Went to Kheng Cheng School for Happy Toilet Seminar with Yuhan and Zhao Mi. The school was used in the filming for the Channel 8 7pm show, Let it Shine. The school is actually a primary school! And they used a different uniform for the show. The school's really nice, very good environment for studying. Looking at the little boys and girls, I missed my primary school. I missed those good old days. And guess what, I met Mrs Soh and Mrs Tan at the seminar! (:

Currently in love with Jay Chou's 心雨. I jus love it so much that it's on the repeat mode in my zen neeon.

心里的雨倾盆而下
也沾不湿她的发
泪晕开明信片上的牵挂
那伤心原来没有时差

心里的泪倾盆而下
却始终淋不到她
寒风经过院子里的枝桠
也冷却了我手中的鲜花

oh no. I just realised that I have been singing the wrong lyrics for the chorus today. The last two words should be 鲜花 but I sang as 牵挂. uh oh.

I actually thought a lot on the bus about this song and I came out with my very own interpretation of it. I interpret it as disappointed love... for the guy's heart is crying out, raining internally. A phenomenon that the girl he loves cannot see and most likely will not feel. Hence the rain couldn't touched her (ie wet her hair). Another interpretation would be that no matter how heavy the rain is inside his heart, he cannot bear to let her be affected by it so he 'shelters' her with an umbrella, just because he loves her too much for her to be hurt.

That's the power of love. This is yet another song about a 痴情王子. aw.

oh no. Now Eileen calls me 'Babel', short form for 'Baby Bel'. oh puh-lease.

HAHA. alright this post is SO random but who cares. I'm loving it. Love is in the air!~

"So long as I can breathe or I can see, so long lives your love which gives life to me." - William Shakespeare

Random Thoughts

I want to go to Barcelona for a holiday right now.

I want to add something fresh and interesting into my dull lifestyle.

I want myself to be more hardworking.

I want myself and the people around me to be trouble-free.

I want to spend my Valentine's Day indulging in romance novels at Starbucks cafe ;)

But for now, I NEED to get some homework done.

Anyway I was just wondering, where would I be 10 years from now? What would I be doing and would life still with the same as the current with my friends and family? I don't know. Life's uncertain. The least I could do now is to appreciate and enjoy life.

Life is short, don't worry too much. BE HAPPY (:

Feeling Lucky

I was trying to read this real cheem notes on The Tempest given by Mdm Nora. Then I couldnt take it and went into the living room to take a breath of fresh air. My mom passed me this envelope with 'Teens pte ltd' printed on it. And guess what...

tadaa!

I have been picked as the winner for the Jay Chou giveaway in teens Nov 2006!!!

wheeeeee. I won a Jay Chou Incomparable Concert DVD and a Still Fantasy Poster. How wonderful can that be.

Sometimes surprises come when you least expect them. I am now as happy as a king!

Yep i guess that applies to fate too. I am really confused about the meaning of fate lately. It's making me go round and round in circles. And I have totally no idea where I will land up in. Yeah fate never fails to make fun of me, and many other individuals in this world.

Anyway an interesting incident took place yesterday. Though it put me at the risk of being blinded for the rest of my life, I find it rather comical and add spices to my school days. LOL. Thanks to Li Wen! It's not going to be funny if narrated it out. It's more of ... action-packed. I got smacked right in the face for she thought I was the door. And there was quite an audience around. How embarrassing. I hope Li Wen learns her lesson and takes note of where her hand is heading towards next time. LOL everything happened too fast for me to react and it's not becos I am dumb or I have the tendency to do dumb things alright =p

I managed to get started on my A.P tutorial questi0ns. Did till Q7 only. And I really squashed my brain cells to think about Q8. I don't think it's that difficult but I can't work it out somehow. I shall ask for help tomorrow.

I am getting more and more motivated lately. Yeah that's a good sign.

Oh ya the subject that I am becoming phobic towards is CSC. I don't exactly hate it. But I just fear it, fear taking it for my A'levels. I know very well that I havent been working hard for this subject so I better start doing so right now. I need motivation for this subject. I shall start with small steps which is to go to the china websites and read up at least 5 articles. Not too hard to achieve I suppose.

Presenting to you a quote from my very MATURE junior, Nicole =p

I have learned to seek my happiness by limiting my desires, rather than attempting to satisfy them. - John Stuart Mills

CHEERS! (:

Being Happy

What is the definition of 'being happy'? Have you really thought about it?

I don't know. I just know that when I feel happy, I know it. It's just a magical feeling that human beings are born to enjoy. The happiness, the bliss, the joy. It's like you are at the top of the world and nothing could ever upset you. I love that feeling. I love being happy. I love seeing people around me, especially my loved ones being happy.

But life is not meant to be smooth-going otherwise normal beings won't appreciate and treasure the happy moments. It's the pain we experienced in life that makes us human. It's the unhappiness that makes us learn to cherish the happiness.

It may seem like the end of the world when we feel upset. It's like the whole world has turned its back on you. You feel like there's not a single soul who cares about your existence and you are better off dead.

NO. that's not the case. There are people who care, people who are there for you. Yep I know because I have truly experienced it, countless of times perhaps. These people really give your mood a lift and everything becomes hopeful again.

Yep I think true happiness is having friends and family there for you when you are feeling down and also noticing them and appreciating them. And they are the happiness-providers. Life would be so dull without them, so meaningless.

Quite a lot of things happened in just a couple of days then my emotions took a roller-coaster ride, leaving me all drained of energy and the ability to think rationally. I can't help it. But I must really thank JAYYES for being there to listen and give me advice. I really appreciate it. And yeah. All 5 of you are inevitably the components of the element of happiness in my life.

THANKS GIRLS (:

I have become quite a worrier lately. Worrying about those matters which are worrying and also worrying about matters which are not worrying at all. Yeah. And Nicole dropped me a quote just in time for this post, that is to advise me to stop worrying. Thanks (:

There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will - Epictetus

Being not-happy

I am not going to help with YMCA's jumble sale later, neither am I going for yoga class. Feeling unwell and rotten, cos' I didn't sleep well last night. I slept at 12 am and I woke up three times before my designated wake-up time.

I have been thinking and thinking. I have done and said so many wrong things and I only realised it now. And my irresponsible actions have not only hurt myself but others. It makes no sense. I didn't know I am so insensitive. Or rather I didn't consider the consequences. I didn't think that much.

I know this may be the start of a series of worrying and not-happy incidents. I am not-happy and I think it's a sin. I strived to be happy but when the reality cum truth sinks in, it hurts twice the happiness I enjoyed the past weeks.

I really really don't know what to do.

I may not be able to sleep well and eat well. But it's not going to make up for the hurt I caused others. They may have even more sleepless nights and irregular meals.I am jus too simple-minded sometimes.

The last thing I ever want to do is to hurt others. And I did it unknowingly.

I thought the happy days have finally come. Nah I don't deserve it. I SO do not deserve it.

No amount of salt water can make up for what I have done.

I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.
I am sorry.

I am really very sorry.

Passion Talk at ACSI

Attended this 'Passion Talk' at ACS (Independent) today with CSC members. It is a combined seminar with a few local JCs participating. Yeah pretty inspiring... And I quoted a number of phrases from the guests' speeches, which I can use in the future to spur my peers or myself on.

There's so much to do this weekend! I am going for SDSC/SVC Flag Day tomorrow. Please donate generously if any of the flag-dayers approaches you. BE NICE (: Make someone's day lah ;)

I am helping with YMCA's jumble sale on Sunday and maybe rushing down to Oasis Holistic for my yoga class if possible. I still have to re-read/complete reading 'Pride and Prejudice'. There's GP essay to be drafted, BSP advertisement to be drawn out, Maths assignment on Binomial Theorem, Literature essay and lotsa readings to do for CSC.

I get so stressed thinking about it. So I shan't think about it and have an early night. Tomorrow's gonna be a fun flag day.

Being optimistic is the way to live life ^^

Movies

I am on the verge of dozing off any moment. Have been feeling really tired these few days after staying up till 130am to finish my CSC essay. That was the product of my procrastination. And the consequences were terrible.

Watched 'Happy Birthday' Trailer jus now... The movie doesn't seem as engaging after watching it. Maybe becos' the trailer was in Cantonese with English subtitles. The language is foreign to me, perhaps creating a distance between the film and myself. Louise Koo looked nerdy in the film but still as good-looking ;) When I read the synopsis, I felt that the story plot is enough to make me weep like there's no tomorrow. But the trailer was pretty disappointing. I am still going to watch the movie I guess. Cos I want to find out what happened to the male protagonist in the end. But there will most likely be a sad ending. aw.

Another must-catch movie currently in cinemas would be 'Miss Potter'. It's an autobiography film for Beatrix Potter, a writer in 20th century and what she had to overcome in order to be a writer and get her books published. The setting seems to be like that in Pride and Prejudice, which is one of the reasons why I want to watch it.

Lately despite being busy, I am happy. I have become more optimistic these days, after reading that inspirational book. I haven't finish reading it though hehe. Don't forget that I still have Literature books to tackle. Yeah and I also discovered that weekends are my most unproductive time. I just seem to put off everything to the very last minute and not get anything done in the end. No, I must do something. Hmmm. Brainstorm for solutions!

And 'Angel and Mortal' game is getting more and more exciting as the days go by. I have become a popular demand for writing and passing postcards. FOC. What a nice person I am hor ? ^^

I shall watch Pan's Labyrinth trailer before heading for my bed. It's early but I really can't take it any longer. I need my beauty sleep. I took some photos of my giant piggie jus now. A new year gift from my daddy. wahaha it's such a sweetie pie and so-very-huggable. Are you jealous? =p